So sorry I’ve been a snail about blogging. Below’s why…also FYI, the next six months will be slower on my blogs because I’ll be editing the broadcast version of When I Walk for PBS. Forgive me please and think of me slaving away at my computer. Ahem…
New York City teems with people, but it’s so easy to feel alone here. Not just that part living in the same place where you were once mobile in and no longer can isolate you further. The streets that I scooter down I can’t help but pass by and remember the same streets when I was walking… I remember quickly walking each morning to take the L train to some tide-me-over temp job along First avenue. Now, as his scooter past L train and watch people bound down the stairs, I’m reminded of what once was.
These days, it’s very difficult or near impossible to find somebody that fits just right. My life here in New York has been pretty quiet when it comes to relationships over the past little while. The occasional dating, the occasional relationship, but really it’s been something that I haven’t been able to properly handle. It was realizing that my own insecurities and changing self-identity was preventing me from being in a place that I was comfortable being by myself, much less being comfortable with somebody else. I decided that I would have to settle for a relationship that wasn’t the ideal in some form or just be content with the fact that I would be by myself or with no serious relationship for the rest of my time. Not only that, but with my life as an independent filmmaker and that my medical appointments all rolled up into one, I presumed I wouldn’t even have the time to be serious with somebody even if I wanted to.
I met Alice few months ago at a transformational psychology workshop that we both attended. As in any intensive workshop setting, it’s difficult to get to know anybody really well. Me being me, I wasn’t paying much attention to my surroundings, but when I met her and we began talking, she told me that she knew of multiple sclerosis because her mom had it. After the workshop was over we started hanging out. We fit each other really well. She’s really smart (environmental engineer) and creative (art practicioner and appreciator) and attractive and genuine. We both are in our early 30’s and know what we want in our lives. It’s like a breath of fresh air.
I don’t really know how this happened. Well I guess I do. It is as you said, Suzan (one of my blog readers) in your comments in a blog I wrote on relationships: things will happen when you put yourself out there to make them happen.
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About Alice11 comments to About AliceLeave a Reply |
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The post and the video put a smile on my face. I miss you both!
♥
jason i am so very happy for you and your new love!!!
im always thinking of you- if i prayed it would be the equivalent saying a daily prayer!
much loving from vancouver.
xoxo
Jason, I am so happy for you. When I read your blogs i realize even more that life is not a dress rehearsal and we have to make the best of what God gives us. You have surely done that and your rewards are only just beginning. I wish Alice and you much happiness.
Jason,
this entry hit a point that you’ve kinda been avoiding. we can’t do too much in this life without involving people and so far you’ve been doing this project solo, still involving others, but not in this sense.
i think a lot of people out there live in fear of something that guides them through the days, the fear being an influence on their experiences and interactions with others. with MS you are facing not only fears but selfishness, on the part of others, that would seemingly make every interaction much the same – guarded, slathered in politeness. From what you’ve said about Alice’s past she is already in the know about what you are facing everyday…she obviously has a handle on her fears and sees past the awkwardness of not knowing what to talk about and her gentle, kind and playful personality is at the forefront of her interactions with you. All of this is so healthy man, it’s reaching a part of you that has been neglected for too long – your heart. We can’t go at too much by ourselves…
i am greatly happy for you right now bro.
Happy New Year Jason. I wish you the best of health, wealth, and relationships for 2010 and beyond. May all your dreams come true, and may your seemingly endless nights of editing be blessed with efficient cuts and fades, etc.
Thanks to you Jeremiah and thanks to everyone for the comments and kind words. Alice is wonderful – it’s like being in a dream!
Thanks Nicole!
Jason, I am so totally thrilled and so happy for you, it looks like Alice is that wonderful person who has come into your life. Alice, I look forward to meeting you someday soon.
Jason,
I’m so glad that you’ve met someone so wonderful. This life is a long one and it’s really hard to go it on your own. Your blog is quite the reminder of the struggles people face and I’m so impressed with how you’ve confronted them so openly and candidly. Keep blogging! Best of luck with Alice and hope to see you both when you’re back out this way.
Isn’t it great to meet someone who gets your struggles without you having to explain? Thank you Alice! Jason, I feel comforted for you by this news!
So this is Alice! So happy for both of you. James has commented that you sound wonderfully distracted, Jason! All the best, Sylvia and James